Carole Simpson

Coronavirus Part Deux

Mar 13, 2020 | Health, Something. To. Say.

Coronavirus Part Deux

Hello Everybody:

       I have some more things to say about the coronavirus Covid-19 pandemic

       I told you I was afraid a week ago?  Well, now I am 6 times as afraid. So scared, I got out of Dodge. Well, I actually got out of Boston and my high-rise condo, with its 35 floors and crowded elevators. I am now hunkered down in our summer home off the Atlantic Ocean. 

       Now I didn’t do this on my own. My daughter, Doctor Mallika Marshall was hounding me leave Downtown Boston and come here. There are no crowds this time of year and little to do. Mallika said she doesn’t want me coming back home until she decides it’s safe for me. Isn’t it funny how the children become the parents.

       Although otherwise healthy, it’s my age. Dr. Marshall said when we get older, we lose our reserves to ward off disease. I have a 79-year-old, heart, old lungs, old kidneys…you get the picture. So, elderly people are the most likely to die from the coronavirus.

        So here I will stay—quarantining myself. I have my pets with me, my iPhone, the Internet, my television, some books on tape, jigsaw puzzles and plenty of food. I’m blessed, I know, to have this option. And I pray that you will be safe. Just take all the precautions and know that “this too will pass.”

Until next time.

Coronavirus Anxiety

Mar 7, 2020 | Health, Something. To. Say.

Coronavirus Anxiety

        Hello Everybody. I have something to say about the coronavirus pandemic. To be honest with you, I am afraid. I’m very afraid. I’m in the elderly high-risk group. I’ve been living on this earth for seventy years and I can’t ever remember anything sweeping half the countries on the planet bringing with it, disease and death. And to make matters worse, our government seems ill-prepared to handle the crisis that is already changing American life as we knew it just six weeks ago.

         We were in a Costco last weekend to do what the experts say we should do. Stock up on paper goods, hand sanitizers, medicines and other necessities, in case we have to be quarantined. You’ve been in a Costco and you know the check-out lines are in the front and the food is way in the back. Well the lines at every checkout station stretched all the way back to the meat. People pushed baskets overflowing with toilet paper and bottled water and wine and candy. Whatever your necessities are.

        I couldn’t wait in those lines. I went somewhere else, but I did stock up. And I’m washing my hands feverishly, and I’m afraid to touch my face and scared to turn a doorknob. Trump continues to minimize the danger, but scientists warn things will get worse before they get better.

        So, as silly as I feel with all my provisions, I think we all should heed, “Better safe than sorry.” People, get ready.

 

I hope to see you next time.

C’mon. Cure the Common Cold

Jan 13, 2020 | Health, Something. To. Say.

C’mon. Cure the Common Cold

Hello Everybody.  I have something to say about the common cold.

As you can see, I’m suffering from one right now, like millions of Americans. I wonder how we can design driverless cars, and smartphones and take pictures of a black hole, but can’t come up with a cure for the common cold. I know it’s a bad flu season but there’s a flu vaccine. But nothing to prevent a cold. Do you know Americans have a billion colds a year? Adults get colds 2 to 3 times, and children 10 times a year.

I was walking down an aisle in Home Goods a few days ago and a man was approaching on the other side. He got about a foot from me and let out a loud, wet, sloppy sneeze. I was like, “Oh no. There are cold droplets in the air and they’re falling on me.” What could I do? Nothing. And two days later I was had a runny nose, started coughing and sneezing, had a headache and sore throat. No fever. A bad cold.

Researchers, who have been trying to find a cure since 1950, say it’s extremely difficult because there are at least 160 different viruses that cause colds. They ask, how do you get a vaccine that will take care of all of them? Still seems a cure is a long way off.

So, we have to be content with cough syrup, decongestants, nose sprays, Tylenol, and lot of tissues and hot tea. It’ll be over in 7 to 10 days, but in the meantime, it’s a drag.

Until next time.

Zip It on the Ailments, Old Folks!

Sep 13, 2019 | Health, Something. To. Say. | 0 comments

Zip It on the Ailments, Old Folks!

Hello, Everybody. I have something to say about old people’s complaints about getting old. It’s boring.

      Who wants to hear all about their aches and pains, and operations and what the doctors said? I know—it’s very important to them, but not to the rest of us. Now, I’m not talking about people with life-threatening diseases that most people would want to know about. I’m talking about visiting or calling up a friend and having them talk only about the things that hurt. Their knees, their hips, their stomach, their back. That’s all they want to talk about.

      Lately, I’ve been hearing complaints from all kinds of friends and relations. I guess it’s because there are more older people alive today than ever in our history. The 74 million baby boomers are getting old and, by God, they’re going to tell you about it. But if they don’t start talking about things other than their pains, people will avoid them and stop calling or visiting. Then the old folks will be lonely, and they’ll complain about that.

      Aging is inevitable, universal and terminal. It is what it is. So, you may as well make the most of it and stop your belly aching. Nobody wants to hear it.

See you next time.

Cheetos Gone Wild

Jul 21, 2019 | Health, Something. To. Say. | 0 comments

Cheetos Gone Wild

Hello Everybody. I have something to say about fried chicken and Cheetos. Yes, fried chicken and Cheetos.

I was driving around and saw a KFC advertising “New. Cheetos Sandwich.” Why would anybody make a sandwich with Cheetos?  I was curious.  I went inside and asked for the chicken Cheetos sandwich. They were sold out. I asked the clerk, “That popular?” She said, “Oh, yes.” I begged for one for educational purposes and she agreed to make me one. I went all out and got the super-duper Lovers Box that came with extra Cheetos stuff I decided you might want to see me try it. So here we go…

Doesn’t taste bad. But, why do it? I guess nobody was thinking about heart disease and the obesity epidemic in America.

If you want one better hurry. It’s a limited time offer. But I think I’ll eat my chicken sandwich by itself and eat my Cheetos out of the bag.  See you next time.

Chocolate is Good for You

May 28, 2019 | Health, Something. To. Say. | 0 comments

Chocolate is Good for You

Hello everybody. I have something to say about chocolate.

I have been a lifelong chocoholic. When some people get upset about something, they turn to drinking, smoking, taking pills or eating. My drug of choice has always been chocolate. I don’t even have to eat it. Just knowing I have some stashed away is comforting. 

They’ve always said chocolate is bad for you…all the fat, sugar and calories are unhealthy. Now comes a report I’ve been waiting for most of my life. This year no less than the American Heart Association conclusively reported that dark chocolate is packed with nutrients and is high in flavonoids. Flavonoids are anti-oxidants that can lower blood pressure and lower the risk of heart disease. 

That’s not all. Dark chocolate can improve cognitive function in old people like me.  Helps your heart and brain? What more could you ask for? But you have to eat dark chocolate with at least 70 percent or more of cacao, that’s the raw chocolate. But we are cautioned to eat the chocolate in moderation. Despite the healthful benefits. It still has lots of calories.

I found out something else. Do you know which candy bar is the most popular all over the world?  It’s Snickers.  Reese’s peanut butter cups came in second. Time for a snack. Hmmm.